Pitch black brain


So I recently stumbled across an article that talks about aphantasia, and I realize this may be what I have, but never had a name to put to it. I have never been good with visualizing, from math, to trying to draw from memory, I always need a reference. Or with math, scratch paper. When I try to picture any of my family, I can’t. There is nothing. When I took the test on this website it gave a few prompts, for example trying to picture a rising sun. When I tried all I saw was blackness. I KNEW a sun was rising in the sky, but I can’t see it and there were no colors. One thing I noticed is that when someone says picture a red star. I can in my mind draw a star. I don’t see a pencil, paper etc. I see nothing, but I know that I am drawing and outline of a star. The best way I can describe it, is if someone gives you a paper and says close your eyes and draw a star, you can. Why? Because you can feel the movement on the paper, it’s muscle memory. In my mind when I try and visualize a shape, I feel the shape, but I can’t see it. On and end note, I have very vivid dreams, no problem. But everything else is blackness. Thoughts anyone? I really need some input. 

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