Being able to stay focused


I have found through years of research ( book reading and YouTube videos) that the deeper my research went the broader The topics became. So much so To the point that I couldnt continue my research in any one main topic. It has gotten to the point that out takes me almost all day to read through my emails, let alone be able to stay focused on one or two topics or activities. It seems that everything catches my eye and that leads my research path into a pointless, fruitless, unorganized mess. Although I learn amazing things while my research goes astray, I have a hard time remembering where I started let alone where I left off. This causes me to know about many, many, many, topics and idea and terms, while leaving me without the frame work too produce one single, documented fruit of my labor. I know in my heart and mind I could write book after book or research article or study, but can’t seem to focus on one topic long enough to stop my research and produce something with it. It’s to the point where I all myself “what would be my favorite or most interested topic trip write about?” and come to realize that I have such a wide spectrum of choices that I can’t even decide. It’s like someone asking “if you could know anything in the world, or could ask for an answer to any question you ever had?” They really couldn’t ask the question because the choices word be endless. Meaning the scope would be way to broad. 

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Hi Heidi,

  I read your post and understand the frustration you are expressing about narrowing your focus when exploring. I was able to transition this to a more “positive” position when I embraced the idea that “the more I KNOW, the more I realize I do not know”. This allows me enjoy the expansion of exploration and keep centered in an “I don’t know” mindset. Also, there is NOTHING that supports the notion that “talking hairless apes” have the cognitive capacity to truly understand a multi-faceted reality. We live in a matrix of integrated systems ranging from the sub-atomic to the cosmological. All intertwined with NO set boundaries and constant interaction. That is why your studies keep taking you “off track” and into other fields/topics. The idea of reductionist answers are a fault of modern Scientism and a hard conditioning to break.

  You are onto something and a personal “AHA Moment” if you embrace the “broad scope” and make it your ally or friend. I understand that I cannot know everything and this is what fuels my wonder and curiosity. Part of what you are up against is the “fear of the unknown”. We all work with this and process it differently. This “fear” makes us create religions and fairytales to supply an “answer” even though it is false. Easier to have a delusional position than admit you do not have a fucking clue about the Nature of Reality or the Human Experience. Past few years I have been actively practicing “embracing uncertainty” in order to process the dilemma that you describe. Most people are “asleep” and go through life purposefully avoiding questioning the “game”. You are in the small percentage that questions things. Be thankful! It is not the idea that most people do not KNOW anything that is frightening, it is the fact that most do not even SUSPECT.

  Language is also a barrier and adds to your frustration. We make statements all the time demonstrating this when we declare we “KNOW SOMETHING or ANYTHING”. I can make the statement ‘I know Heidi” and operate from this false premise. I cannot “know” you. I cannot crawl into your skin and process reality from your unique perspective! The statement should be “I know OF Heidi”. The “of” part is the key in cognition and understanding. But we never use this linguistic conveyance correctly-I don’t have an answer about this problem with human communication, but I lecture on this when I teach to express the idea that it is a wonder that ANYTHING gets transferred between people in the process.

  Essentially I want to share with you that you are “OK”. Relax and take a few calming breaths and embrace the expansion of consciousness you are experiencing. Realize that this expansion is a “constant” and NOTHING will really be “known’. Best we can do is stay centered on the experiential aspect of Reality and that is enough.

Have a Great Day


I am exactly the same.  My career path can best be described as policy supply chain sustainability environmental slavery and procurement expert

I tell people that I, like Dirk Gently, believe in the fundamental interconnectedness of all things.

Because I know quite a lot about many many areas and I read fast I am actually very good in my role which is connecting dots others don’t see.  This is because they tend to be specialist eg they are a travel procurement professional, I tell them all about the law and policy changes that are coming up that affect them link them up with the energy team who are doing work with the grid to plan a charging network, and the policy teams in the energy and environmental  departments and tell them that they can use spending to leverage the change that they want in their policy.  I tell all of them that they need to talk to the ICT team as chips are critical to what they are doing and that critical and conflict mineral supply, as well as global supply chain disruption will impact them and the risk of slavery in those supply chains,  I link them to the NGOs and the business departments and other bodies who are working on supply chain security and the treasury people working on tax policy.  I then tell them about the strategic risks and opportunities to travel as a service such as making it more accessible for disabled people and link them up with the charities and stakeholder groups that I work with

I then help them prioritise all this, set up working groups, redesign parts of their contract and tender documentation, help them evaluate it and work with suppliers before and after the contract is awarded.

I have 2 science degrees and a science masters a law degree, am almost finished with a procurement degree.  Because of this I struggle to understand people who aren’t equally interested in understanding all the things around what they are doing and I can find it difficult to pitch to people

Scope creep is a huge problem with me, as is my perfectionist nature.  If I was asked to carbon footprint I would also be, can we not also lay some groundwork for the future water footprinting that we will be doing with them anyway in a few years.