My weariness with hyperfantasy

While I'm trying to understand my current mental state, and I've researched this because I spend most of my time just in my imagination, whether I want to or not, I just completed the questionnaire and the truth is I'm still there and it bothers me because I feel like the sun is shining in my eyes. Ugh, I'm tired of remembering people and their details. My mind is used to dissecting people and then simulating them in my mind. I don't like to desecrate things with my mind; it seems terrifying and uncontrollable. The worst part is the dreams, or the unreality. Right now, for two days I've felt like there's someone inside my eyes, and I can feel and see them. And I'm afraid of feeling, smelling, touching, and seeing what I imagine. I think I'm partly afraid of breaking the boundary between reality and imagination, which is why I spend most of my days locked in my room. But I'm still outside, and in a way, I like it because I remember the details of where everything is and the geographical map of the little I know outside my house. People I haven't seen for years are still by my side, so real that I can still hear their voices.

My biggest problem is exhaustion. I don't do much, and I feel so incredibly tired mentally that it's hard to even move. I just took a nap, but I kept waking up. I don't feel crazy; I just want to know why I feel this way because I remember and see worse things, things so real that my body aches.

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Neal White•recently•edited

I understand, even though I'm on the other end of the scale. My wife has hyperphantasia and has said that at times, she'd prefer having my aphantasia. Bad dreams I also understand, though mine are in total darkness. I'd suggest finding someone to talk to, a friend, counselor, or professional. Here are some ideas. I hope you find them useful. * If you're not sleeping well, it's no wonder that you're exhausted. I take melatonin 2-3 hours before I go to bed. You might try that. Or see a doctor for something stronger. * Make sure you're eating properly, which should also help with the exhaustion. * Exercising might help. I like to go on long bike rides. It's easy to sleep when your body is tired out. * Controlling your breathing can help you relax and take control of your thoughts. * I find that I can reset my mental state by breathing in for 4 seconds, holding for 16 sec, and exhaling for 8 sec. Repeat the sequence a few times until you feel your mind is at ease. * When I'm trying to fall asleep, but my mind is racing, I take conscious control of my breathing and take slow deep breaths. I count my breaths, focus on the physical feeling of those breaths (both in and out), and use the mental sequence number to drive out intrusive thoughts. I've never been able to count sheep, so this works for me. You might try counting something joyful, like kittens. * Try to learn lucid dreaming, so you can guide your dreams towards more pleasant subjects. * Is it possible for you to reframe this as a mental gift? Don't try to block the experience, but instead, divert it to a happier place. * If that doesn't work, perhaps you should try listening to upbeat music to help with the diversion. * During the day, you might try reading a good book/ebook to escape from your thoughts. * Can you try to express your images and feelings as art? Sometimes just "getting it out" can help.