One childhood issue is so clear now

Hi all, new to the discussion. I found out I had aphantasia last year and honestly mostly it's ‘whatever’ to me. People are all across the spectrum and we all are who we are. We do the best we can with what we have. However, I do find it interesting to explain some of my quirks and one thing struck me as an ‘aha’.

When I was a kid, I was literally the worst to try to get to sleep. I feel terrible for my poor mom and dad. I was always trying to negotiate staying up later, secretly reading in bed, sneaking out of bed and so on.

I now realize, for me, when I closed my eyes it was the darkness. The inability to sort of lull myself to sleep with visualizations. As I got older, I would make up full fictional stories in my head which would drift me off to sleep. Each night, I'd pick up where I was and continue the story until it was done, and then start another one. These stories could go on for weeks if I created a good one.

Anyone else have to come up with sleep coping mechanisms when they were young?

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Chantal Drouin-Charters•recently

Yep, I used to do the same thing....up until recently. I would continue the story every night where I left off, one scenario would take forever because I would fall asleep and forget where I left off. Finding it harder now as I don't have a topic that I like enough to build a story around. That's likely why I'm having trouble sleeping now. My mind keeps racing with pointless things and to do's.

Suzette Thorby•recently

When I was a child I would think about puppies, mostly their soft puppy fur and their sweet, oddly skunky puppy breath. These days I'm able to focus on the depth and sensation of my breath often doing serval rounds of 4-7-8 breathing or box breathing. I still like to throw some puppy thoughts in there every once in awhile, it never feels like a bad choice. I always sleep with white noise, I cannot sleep without it.

Neal White•recently•edited

The darkness was just normal for me, so no I did not need to counteract it in any way. I have been a night owl most of my life and stay up far too late sometimes, but part of that is due to waiting until I actually feel sleepy before I go to bed. Otherwise, my mind may run frantically, like a like a hamster on its wheel. As an adult, I learned to breathe slowly and count my breaths, to counteract those frantic racing thoughts. That works, but only if I really focus on my breathing, to avoid intrusive thoughts. These days, I take melatonin, which really helps.

Josephina Frederika•recently

Yes, and as I grew older, I countered it by falling asleep with the TV on. Or these days, with a Netflix series. Works like a charm. I've become so well trained that I even fall asleep at the cinema now. :-)

Pippa Hunt•recently

Absolutely!!! I used to struggle immensely and as time went on I unknowingly taught myself how to almost ‘turn my brain off’ or ‘stop thinking’. I am able to concentrate my focus on the blackness of my brain and use it as a way to fall asleep almost immediately now. I do find that having some form of white noise input (fan, clock, quiet podcast, etc.) is very necessary for me to be able to do this as otherwise it is too quiet. I didn’t realize that my ability to do this was unusual until I mentioned it to my hyper visual mom a few years ago.

jonathanwiebel119j0•recently

Hey, I did the exact same thing, and still do. I have trouble falling asleep, i think because there is only blackness and nothing to distract my mind. So it is either thinking about (ie worrying) about my problems and daily life or telling myself a story as a distraction. These days a small ear bud with an audio book allows me to fall asleep easier, and the stories are generally better.