Cathrin Hagey

I've only recently realized that I have aphantasia. I've been excitedly "testing" friends and family ever since. I've discovered that one of my grown children has it as well and I can tell you that she is pretty freaked out about it. In trying to explain it to others, I've run into a few difficulties, the main one being that I don't even fully understand how I retrieve information. I've been saying that I have a data bank that I draw from and I can list in my mind the traits that I recall. I'm extremely verbal and write creatively. I also hold a degree in mathematics. Occasionally a visual image will appear in my mind in quite a bit of detail, but I have no control over when and what and for how long. I do dream visually. When I was a young child I wondered how we know that we're all seeing the same things. For instance, I asked my mother, "How do we know that when I see the colour red and you see it, too, that we're seeing the same thing?" She thought it was a stupid question. But now I know that I must have been at least a little aware that I "see" things differently. I have emotional connections to colours, days of the week, months of the year. I rotate 3-D objects mentally in a kinesthetic way that I can barely explain, even to myself. I think having aphantasia helps me to get to sleep faster than my husband who has trouble letting go of the visions in his mind when he wants to rest. I'm only beginning to learn about this. I hope to have a better grasp on how I imagine things in the future.