Hi chetty vendetti, For some reason I can't reply to your comment, only to myself! Thanks so much for your reply. I can definitely relate to your comment about being reckless because of not being able to "see" the consequences to your actions. I'm trying to look at the positives, like how we live totally in the moment because that's all there is. I'm beginning to understand that for most people living in the future or the past is more than an abstract concept. People must get carried away in memories and "what ifs". It must bring satisfaction, sure, because they can remember these events that happened and that must bring people happiness. But also a sense of things not being "enough" because if I could see things as they could be, I'd always be striving for things to be different. I learned yesterday that people can access other senses and also their emotions too. They can recall tastes, sounds, smells, textures, and even emotions! When people feel a certain way, it can "take them back" to when they felt that way before. And when they recall an event, they can actually feel the emotions they felt then. For me, for example, I went to a wedding this weekend, I know I was really happy, but it's not like I can remember it and feel that happiness! That's really quite amazing. But also heart-breaking, what if you remember something and it makes you feel really sad. We do have our own kind of superpower. I'm so grateful that I can't picture things in a way, because everytime I look at a leaf, or hear a bird, it's like seeing and hearing for the first time. I feel I can always be satisfied with what I have right now because it's all I have. People seem to struggle a lot with the concept of death. For me, I've known people that have died, but not being able to remember their face, or conjure up the senses or emotions in terms of the experiences I've shared, I feel like I just don't see them often anymore. They're no more not there than they weren't not there when they weren't physically in front of me. I can't imagine a world with or without me, so it makes no difference to me if I'm there or not, except that I would no longer be able to experience things in the present moment. But I understand now that to most other people, they would be able to see the world with and without me. Death of others must be incredible hard for most other people, though I don't really understand the concept of being afraid of death. What do people imagine happens when they die? We don't know what happens when we die so I guess each person has a different version of it. Notice that everything you experience is like you're experiencing anything for the first time ever and it makes things a lot easier to cope with. It doesn't matter if you've been reckless. The way we sensually experience the world must be so far removed from how everyone else does, and that isn't a bad thing. Our only reality is the present.