Quick Craftsperson 9438

I am 73 and with a big surprise I found that I have aphantasia. Or rather, I found out that other people can see with their eyes closed. I always thought that word “imagine” or even visualize is to imagine that you see, not really see. When I imagine something, it is not one picture, it is wider, it is a possibility of all the pictures within the concept. Word is a symbol, picture is also a symbol, one specific, chosen memory, one shot of reality. I always thought that people imagine in a similar way, and when they say something like “I picture the sunset at the beach” it is a metaphor, not that they really see that sunset with the closed eyes. Yes, I close eyes sometimes to imagine, but it is not to see, it is to stop seeing, so I can focus on the sunsets on the beaches, and kind of know them and feel them. If I was a teenager, the idea of being different and not being able to visualize like the other people do would probably affect me strongly. When I learned it now, the only thought that struck me was that people can visualize other people faces. I asked my sister if she can see our deceased mother and father, and she said that she can, very clearly. That made me grief, because I realized that I will never be able to do that. And that I will never see again any of my friends and others I loved once who already passed away. That made me sad, photos are not the same. But then I realized that they are still stay with me, differently, deep inside, like being part of me. Now I am trying to find out how visual person’s brains work. I am asking all my close friends about their visual experiences. It’s still strange asking such questions, because I need some time to believe that almost everybody can visualize something when they close eyes. The funny thing is that when I was a child, everybody, my teachers, my friends were saying I have strong imagination. They ever called me some names, saying I am always living in the fantasy world. I was reading a lot from a very early age, I loved adventure books, science fiction, fantasy etc. I imagined everything differently, and I remembered that, it was always different if I even watched the movie later. I never saw it (otherwise how could I read at the same time) but everything was kind stored inside in me. So somehow, I was seeing that without seeing. I realized a few more things. I was always helpless with drawing at school, because I could not see in my mind anything. When I was drawing, I just knew the concept, but I did not see it, so I hated drawing. Also, the way I learned. I just had to understand the concept, and then I could use it. I had good memory, but it was not visual memory, it was very abstract. To be honest, now as a few weeks pass after the discovery, I wonder if I would prefer to see with the eyes closed. Would that be limiting? Would I be stuck with one picture, one memory? How would it limit my understanding, and of seeing the reality, of what it is here and now in front of me? Would it make me less open to be aware of all possibilities? And would I be able to close my eyes to not see blank? How would I focus with all those pictures? Even with relationships, as I cannot visualize at all, I do not visualize people faces. Even with family, mu husband, my children, each time I see them, it is a bit like seeing them for the first time. Every moment is new, every contact is different and special, there is always a bit of surprise. How would it be if I would see their faces in my mind? Would that affect my perception of what their faces are showing now? Would I hold old judgments and misunderstandings? Would I be less open to them? Or would it be opposite? A lot of things to find out!

Hi Ben, I have a complete aphantasia, yet I am a hypnotherapist. I see many clients, most can visualize, some cannot, but almost everybody is experiencing emotions without really knowing the source. On the conscious level we can find out what triggers them and learn how to manage them, but the true cause is usually buried deeply in the subconscious mind and connected to some events from the past, sometimes early childhood or later trauma, when we experienced those emotions and they became "wired" in our minds and our bodies. In my opinion, being visual does not give much advantage here. It may help to understand the current triggers, but it may blind situation too. This is because visualization is just the projection of the mind, is what was perceived and interpreted, and not the true, objective picture.