I'm aphantasic. So like probably most of you, if I'm to recall the face of a loved one or someone I know well, I can't "see" them (don't even really know what that would mean) but I could describe them. Like I could sit down with a police sketch artist and guide them through drawing the person's face.
But I realize that it would be very much harder to describe myself to the sketch artist. My own face is more cloaked from recall than other people's faces.
Is that true for any of you as well?
I guess we’re all different. I would not be able to describe my wife of 36 years or my daughters. I certainly couldn’t describe myself (though I suspect I might look a bit like Tom Cruise 😉). I really struggle with faces – I’m not Face Blind but definitely have problems. I couldn’t tell you if close friends have beards or wear glasses – though I recognise them when I see them (as long as I’m expecting to see them). So, for me, I have equal difficulty describing my own face or someone else’s
Your reply really resonated for me, Finbar, I can’t picture or describe myself, my wife, my kids, friends, just the same as what you described.
And funny that Jamie brought up police sketch artist – until I learned of aphantasia in the last year or so and understood that the way my brain works is not neurotypical, one of the things I never understood was how police sketches worked when I’d see it on a TV show. Like I couldn’t comprehend how a third party could draw something so specific and kinda figured the artist was just somehow _really_ good and left it at that lol. So realizing that most other people are able to describe an image they’re recalling was one of a number of light bulb moments for me once I understood what aphantasia was.
Reading the forum and hearing common experiences is eye-opening…
Oh wow! Whenever I have smoked cannabis (a little when I was a teenager and twice since being an adult–turns out, it’s just really not for me) I had the **exact same** uncanny experience of not really recognizing myself in the mirror. That’s wild.
Hey Jamie – this is totally true for me. But I didn’t even realise it until I read your post. When I tried to ‘describe’ my face, I came up with ‘eyes, nose, mouth, brown hair’. Shape of mouth? No idea – it’s a mouth. Size of eyes? Um, eye size? Any stand out features? Mmm, don’t think so.
Curiously, I’ve observed when I use CBD (I have it for medicinal puposes) that I get a surprise when I see my own reflection. Like I don’t recognise myself. I figured this was something to do with being a bit high, but now I wonder if it is mores o related to having aphantasia? And the reason I only notice it occuring when I’m high is because other times, my logical brain ‘knows’ that the reflection is me, but when I’m on CBD, I tend to get out of my logical brain and into my emotional one. So I’m more surprised when I see my reflection. It takes me a hot minute to “accept” (or reason) that the image looking back at me, is me.
Thanks for the post, it’s given me something to ponder.
I could describe myself to a sketch artist as well as I could family or people I’ve seen often, but the first thing that comes to mind when thinking of my own face is high school photographs that were displayed at my grandparents’ house that I looked at often, then I mentally update it to my current state of aging.
One very interesting conversation I had recently with a visualizer led me to Google spatial memory/imagination, and I found that it is possible to have Aphantasia but have spatial memory. My spatial memory is fairly strong, but I’m sure this is another brain process that exists on a continuum, so it would be weaker for some. It makes sense to me that recall of others’ features would be stronger than self-recall if someone doesn’t spend a lot of time looking in the mirror or photographs of themself.
This is really interesting. I also can not picture, or describe faces, and have challenges remembering what others look like. However, I can vagley remember what they look like if I’ve seen a photo of them. I will be able to remember the photo specifically, even if I cant picture it.
I get this! It’s almost like object impermanence with people. It is tough for me to have conversations with people I haven’t seen in a while. I have a bit of phone anxiety because sometimes I can’t picture who I am talking to even if they are very close.
I have no recollection of what my grandparents or my parents looked like. Or my brothers and sister. Or my nephews, nieces, grand nephews, or grand nieces.
I now live in a small town where I just assume that I know everyone and so I act like I know everyone in town.
When I read books I usually skip over adjectives and most descriptive sections b/c they are meaningless to me. I recognize faces when I see them but can’t recall them (and so on, sometimes I wonder how I survived until 76)
